tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post5707771608876184992..comments2023-07-01T07:31:28.450-06:00Comments on LDS Publisher: Christmas 08: The StoryLDS_Publisherhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15053645600240124892noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-73575664535067176362007-12-22T07:51:00.000-07:002007-12-22T07:51:00.000-07:00Since I lost my post, will try again:Today, kids a...Since I lost my post, will try again:<BR/>Today, kids are wise beyond their years, so felt this banter was very palpible. Also, the pace was easy reading, albeit the content was not, since it was thought-provoking. Bravo!<BR/>NaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-14682768705725199462007-12-18T23:17:00.000-07:002007-12-18T23:17:00.000-07:00I think the story has promise; I have to agree wit...I think the story has promise; I have to agree with Rudolph the Red-Pen, though. The story is mostly debate-style dialogue, and not really the sort two strangers would have with each other. We get very little detail about the scene, what the people look like, what's going on around them. I do like the ending quite a bit, though. With a few more drafts, this could be quite powerful.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-52931682176039012072007-12-18T10:20:00.000-07:002007-12-18T10:20:00.000-07:00I vote for this fabulous story that makes you thin...I vote for this fabulous story that makes you think about what is truly happening around us this time of year. Great job!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-25134172029429671002007-12-18T08:37:00.000-07:002007-12-18T08:37:00.000-07:00I love this story....love it!! I have to vote for...I love this story....love it!! I have to vote for this one! Hands down!CDennishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06810636546660497035noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-5317663893729720332007-12-17T09:40:00.000-07:002007-12-17T09:40:00.000-07:00This lovely story paints a picture with emotions, ...This lovely story paints a picture with emotions, not only with words. Each of us has experienced a time when we doubted our faith. Was the young girl really an angel, or the old woman's conscience? This is not only a story for children or teens , but we can all learn from it. If you don't feel a warmth in your heart after reading it, you may want to check your pulse. <BR/>A strong yes vote for this one.<BR/> California PoppyAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-17300060302340323042007-12-17T06:31:00.000-07:002007-12-17T06:31:00.000-07:00I believe that this story (for me) embodied the tr...I believe that this story (for me) embodied the true feeling of Christmas. I vote for this story.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-5993864156583944142007-12-17T01:27:00.000-07:002007-12-17T01:27:00.000-07:00I like the message in this story. I am casting my ...I like the message in this story. I am casting my vote for this one.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-50449035643258386212007-12-10T08:08:00.000-07:002007-12-10T08:08:00.000-07:00What a wonderful and warm story! Children are so ...What a wonderful and warm story! Children are so superbly adept at showing the form of pure love that God himself tells us to show as he did when he sent his son to us to give us eternal life if we believe. We are commanded to love others, and children do this best...they have no prejudices and they are without the bitterness harbored by so many hardened and angy people who would like to erase the the "Christ" part of Christmas and call it instead "holiday". This old woman, perhaps embittered by abuse, loneliness, or tragedy, was shown by this girl that love transcends anything that happens to us on this earth. God rewarded her obedience to love by reaching down and leaving a physical sign of that love for this old woman. We can change lives with a few loving words. This timeless and lovingly written story bears the mark of a classic. Nicely done!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-47056800499812237812007-12-09T12:13:00.000-07:002007-12-09T12:13:00.000-07:00This story engages me in my own thinking about Chr...This story engages me in my own thinking about Christmas... Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men. The message is non-denominational and ageless. When we speak, write or sing the words of Christmas we rejoice. Isn't that what it's all about?<BR/><BR/>"Arrows to Heaven", another beautiful story, another beautiful message...<BR/><BR/>All of the stories posted go straight to the heart! Thank you.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-50166409962133853692007-12-09T10:41:00.000-07:002007-12-09T10:41:00.000-07:00Thank you for sharing your heart. It was an enjoy...Thank you for sharing your heart. It was an enjoyable read.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-56137815429269729012007-12-08T13:22:00.000-07:002007-12-08T13:22:00.000-07:00PS--The writer's use of the phrase "Immaculate Con...PS--The writer's use of the phrase "Immaculate Conception" referring to the birth of Christ is incorrect. In Catholicism, the doctrine of Immaculate Conception has to do with Mary and that she was supposedly born without original sin and lived without sin so that she could bear Christ, who was conceived by a virgin birth.<BR/><BR/> http://encyclopedia.thefreedictionary.com/Immaculate+ConceptionAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-85564304321208206742007-12-08T13:13:00.000-07:002007-12-08T13:13:00.000-07:00The premise of this story is interesing, but ... (...The premise of this story is interesing, but ... (sorry to burst your holiday bubbles) it doesn't work as a children's picture book. As a short story for older readers, maybe, but a picture book for young children, no.<BR/><BR/><BR/>This post is not a vote for this story. (If I'm making a mistake by posting here I hope Ms. Publisher will do us all a favor and delete it. (: ) This post is intended to help the writer and the voters understand why this story is not suitable for a children's book, at least not yet. Hopefully the author will not take this as slamming his/her story, but will take it as critique, or constructive criticism.<BR/><BR/>1. 1,143 words is longish for a picture book. The writer needs to pare it down and re-think word choices. (Puberty is one example.)Make the conversation more befitting an older woman and a child, rather than sounding like two equally articulate adults.<BR/><BR/><BR/>2. Why do readers buy picture books? They buy them for the art. There's nothing in this story that presents opportunity for interesting, colorful art. To interest young readers, there should be more movement, more action. This story is all conversation, and takes place in an airport terminal between two people seated in plastic chairs. Have the older lady out shopping and encountering this child at the grocery store, at the park, at the department store, at the post office, as she goes about her day. (Which would then create scenes to illustrate.)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-44595425057601254592007-12-08T11:58:00.000-07:002007-12-08T11:58:00.000-07:00Beautiful story. It left me with chills when the ...Beautiful story. It left me with chills when the little girl disappeared and then a warmth, like sitting by a crackling fire waiting for my Christmas stocking to be filled with the wonder of the season. Great childrens book!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-27084333630194262922007-12-07T22:06:00.000-07:002007-12-07T22:06:00.000-07:00I loved the dialogue and the feeling that an angel...I loved the dialogue and the feeling that an angel spent some time with the old woman, leaving her a gift. It would make a nice book...especially to family members with children. What an heirloom to pass down through the family. Thanks.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-80813868041033554302007-12-07T21:50:00.000-07:002007-12-07T21:50:00.000-07:00This story reminds me that faith sure of what we h...This story reminds me that faith sure of what we hope for and certain of what is unseen. We all need hope in today's world, as is illustrated in this story.<BR/><BR/>I agree, this would make a great children's book!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-11895439475094004292007-12-07T17:41:00.000-07:002007-12-07T17:41:00.000-07:00Wow, what a beautiful story. I want to share it wi...Wow, what a beautiful story. I want to share it with all my brothers and sisters and their kids. It should be made into a children's Christmas book!! Thank you for writing itAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25573541.post-55633843423075749072007-12-07T16:14:00.000-07:002007-12-07T16:14:00.000-07:00I LOVED this story! I found myself thinking back t...I LOVED this story! I found myself thinking back to all the times I said "Bah Humbug"! <BR/>This story made me realize that there is more to this holiday than just eating and shopping. I will remember it when I count my blessings and I will use it as inspiration for others.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com