10/29/06

Halloween Contest #3

What am I doing here, alone in a corn maze?

I came with a couple of old friends who are trying to cheer me up. I've been in a dark mood for the past couple of weeks, since my girlfriend was killed. I thought that coming out here might lift my spirits.

It isn't working. Personally, I blame Devin, the new friend Chris and Sean had started hanging out with recently. I couldn't say exactly why, but there was something about him that made me uneasy. They brought him along on this trip and, instead of walking with me, the three of them are out lurking in the shadows trying to scare other corn walkers. Alone, I start thinking about the past.

Katie and her roommate were on their way home from the grocery store. No one knows why they pulled off the road on that stretch of deserted highway. Their bodies were found a short ways into the neighboring woods. Identification would have been difficult, if not for the car. The few details from Katie's family suggested the girls had been ravaged by bears, but they sounded skeptical. The Sheriff's Office continued to investigate, but hadn't come to any solid conclusions.

Looking around the cornfield, I wonder how far I could go without running into anyone else. And really, what would stop me from just picking a direction and going between the corn stalks until I emerge? I stare at the dark sky and wonder again why I'm here.

A short while later, Chris and Sean catch up to me and ask if I have seen Devin. Apparently, he had gone to retrieve something from the car and hadn't returned. Getting no response from me, they race back into the corn forest.

After a bit, I think I hear a low growl in the darkness. I know my mind must be playing tricks. I strain to hear more. I hear crashing stalks from behind me and another, louder growl. I can feel my heartbeat thudding in my neck as it races in fear. For just a moment, I wonder if my friends are playing a cruel prank on me, but then I see a pair of glowing eyes, much too close.

My first thought is to run, but I can't seem to break the connection with those menacing eyes. My mouth opens, but no sound comes out as if my breath decided to run when I didn't. I close my eyes and will this apparition, caused by my dark thoughts and lost sleep, to vanish. After a moment, I squint at the ground in front of me and see a pair of shaggy feet and … blue jeans above them? I look up and see Devin, wearing contact lenses and holding a baseball bat. I angrily get up and lunge at him when he swings the bat at me! My last thought before blacking out is that there's a realistic looking bear claw on the end of the bat…

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Scary! I'd like to know more, especially about Devin's motivation for killing and trying to pass it off as a grizzly attack, but I know that 500 words is only enough for the bare facts -- or should I say, the "bear" facts?

Melanie Goldmund

Anonymous said...

I received this comment from a friend of mine when I sent him the story...

I’d like to learn more about some of the mystery surrounding the death of the girls and what, if any, clues made the family suspect a bear attack.


It wasn't really that big of a mystery what happened to the girls, was it?

Anonymous said...

I vote for this one. The setting is good, and for a 500 word limit, there was enough info that I felt I understood the emotional state of the narrator. I would have liked it even more if the ending had been more mysterious, not identifying the jeans and Devin. Just seeing a glowing-eyed bear with a baseball bat would have been interesting; maybe it could have suddenly laughed a slightly familiar laugh to give it away.

Anonymous said...

I vote for this one. This could be a good story if more fully developed.

Anonymous said...

I vote for this one. Let the imagination fly

Anonymous said...

I vote for this one, it goes to show you that you should always trust your first instincts about a perons.