I'm trying to figure out if it's best to use designer perfume to scent the pages of my manuscript and cover letter or if it's okay to just go with a perfume from Target?
The more expensive the perfume, the better. The stronger the scent, the more I will enjoy reading your submission. Don't be stingy. Douse that thing. Or better yet, soak your paper in it over night, then line dry it before using it to print your manuscript. And if you have any left over, put the rest of the bottle in the package as a bribe.
Do I really need to give a serious answer to this? Yes, apparently I do, because I sometimes get scented submissions--particularly romance submissions.
I have also received submissions with:
- the query letter hand-written in purple ink
- the entire mss printed on neon paper
- the entire mss printed in a calligraphy font (or script; or Curlz; or...)
- confetti that explodes out of the envelope when you open it
no, No, NO, NOOOO, NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!